Laughs.... the best medicine..

We were learning about Newton's first law of motion in physics class one day. When asked to recite it in class my friend joked .... " Bodies at rest will remain at rest and bodies at rest will only move when their mothers wake them up......" 

At a recent job interview I was asked , " What would you consider to be your main strengths and weaknesses ? " I said " Well, my main weakness would definitely be my issues with reality -telling what's real from what's not...". Then the interviewer went on... "OK , and what are your strengths...?" I said..... I'M  BATMAN...

Darren was at the airport when he saw a friend looking like he'd just been beaten up. Concerned , he asked him what had happened. Looking dazed his friend said.. "... I really don't know. When I boarded the plane I saw a friend and greeted him. Before I knew it, the airline security jumped and punch on me ..." Darren said, " Really , that is cruel... What did you say to your friend ? "  His friend answered ,... " All I said was , Hi, Jack ..."

A teenager lost a contact lens while playing basketball in his driveway. After a brief fruitless search, he gave up. His mother took up the cause and within minutes found the lens. " How did you do that ?" he asked incredulously. " We weren't looking for the same thing " explained his mother. " you were looking for a small piece of plastic . I was looking for $ 150 ...."